Oliver Turns 2!

On January 24th Oliver turned the big 2!

It's crazy how time flies. 

Since Peter was in the NICO on his birthday we decided the celebrate it a week later with some family.

And it was good timing since having the new baby and all, to have a day dedicated to him.

He was very excited when the day came since he had to wait an extra week, it broke my heart when one day he said he never got his Hulk cake, we figured he wouldn't notice we "missed" his birthday, but he did, and he was really good about it.

I felt bad not doing much for his birthday, but again my mother-in-law saved the day and let us do the party at her place and got the cake so I didn't have to make it and had the place looking so cute. 

Oliver LOVED his cake and was so excited to blow out his candles and he felt pretty special that day.

He got a lot of fun toys and had a great day. 

We love our Oliver, he brings so much joy in our little family.

The Life of a NICU Mother

It's never fun having your baby in the NICU.And I didn't even have it that bad, my kid wasn't fighting for his life and we weren't in there as long as many. But it was very hard for me and I hope I will never have to do it again.

Peter was born Thursday early afternoon and everything looked great, he had low blood sugar but I guess that's pretty normal for bigger babies, so they checked every few hours to monitor it and they really wanted him to nurse. I got him to nurse three times before he went to the NICU. The last time I fed him was early Friday morning and I noticed he was very warm and red, but I figured it was because he had three blankets on him! They wrapped him up so much because of his low blood sugar so I figured that was why he was so warm, so quickly I unwrapped him. I also noticed he kept spitting up junk, that wasn't breast milk and I told the nurse Thursday about it but she said she thought she got all the junk out of him, and I thought it was weird that I couldn't get him to burp. Well after I fed him Friday morning I had Dustin hold him for a bit and change his diaper. Dustin later said he noticed his breathing seemed a little fast but he thought it was normal. After he changed him a nurse asked if we wanted him in the nursery, I was thinking no because I rather have my babies with me but Dustin said "sure" and for some reason I didn't say anything and let her take him.

Not too long she came back and told me his breathing was very shallow so they hooked him up with some air to help him and that he should be fine, then she came again and said that it still wasn't looking good and that they put him in the NICU and to expect him to be there for a day. Then 7, Friday morning the pediatrician came and showed us Peter's X rays and told us his lungs didn't look good and they didn't know why, and his breathing was still looking bad. It's the worst as a parent to hear your child isn't doing well. She took us to the NICU and it was easy to spot him because he was the biggest baby in there by far. It was so hard to see him hooked up with machines and just laying there and I couldn't hold him. It was so heart-breaking. They weren't sure why his lungs were looking bad so they started on anti-biotics in case he has picked up a cold or the flu. After seeing him we left the NICU to let him sleep and rest, he didn't seem like he wanted to be touched.

We went back to my room and I just started sobbing, I really don't do well when my kids are hurt in any way, and I hate anything medical so I was an emotional wreck and Dustin just held me. I had many concerns, I was wondering what happened to Peter and if he will always have health problems? Did this mean I wasn't going to breast feed him since we were going to be apart? Will he and I be close since I wasn't going to be able to be with him that much in the NICU? Would he remember I was his mom?And many more, it was very hard.

Later that day the lactation specialist came in, she was very sweet and let me cry on her shoulder for a good half hour, and told me that I will still be able to breast-feed Peter, and she got me a breast pump right away and gave me information to rent one at home. And she gave me the schedule for pumping and not too stress about how much I pump but to keep doing it. So I started pumping right away.

At the NICO you can see your baby anytime but they have certain "touch" times when they change the diapers and take their temperatures and that is when you can do that and touch them. So every three hours I would be there to  help, then when he fell back asleep I would take the blanket he was wrapped in with me because it would have his smell and it would help me with my milk supply, those were my favorite I would sleep with it because it would smell like Peter. Then I would pump for 40 minutes.

I decided to stay one more night at the hospital because I had a hard time leaving him that night and I didn't want to miss a touch time. My mother-in-law came that night with the boys so I could see them, it was very hard to tell them that Peter wasn't coming home because he was sick and that Dustin and I were staying another night. I did really good not crying till they were leaving, and then some tears were coming down. And I think it effected Thomas seeing me cry that he started crying when they were leaving which is very out of character for him, but I think he had a better idea what was going on and seeing me cry made him sad so I decided to keep a strong face for my kids after that.

Also that night my father in law and Dustin gave Peter and I a Priesthood blessing. With Peter it said he would heal and that he will be home soon and that he would be strong, and that he would be a comfort to me. Then in my blessing it said the Lord knew this pregnancy was hard on my body and that my spirit and my body was very tired and that I will have strength to get through this through the atonement, and that even though Peter and I aren't close physically that we will still be close as mother and son. And that this was the Lord's plan and everything will happen in his time, and that He was watching over our little family. Those blessings were such a comfort to me and answered all of my questions and concerns and after that I was more calm and I had the strength that I needed to continue. I honestly don't think I would have made it through that week without my Savior being there by my side, I knew that the Lord was watching over us. I'm so grateful for this Gospel!

Saturday morning they did another X-ray and his lungs looked worse, I was really sad, but Dustin was such a great comfort and told me it's the darkest right before Dawn. So they decided to check if his heart was ok, and because of the blessings the night before I had a strong impression there wasn't anything wrong with his heart but I let them do the tests and they saw nothing wrong with his heart!

I continued to be with Peter every touch time but went home that night. It was really hard, it was Oliver's birthday and this wasn't how I imagined his birthday was going to be like, and it was hard leaving the hospital with no baby in my arms and people congratulating you as you leave with your baby. I came home with dinner ready thanks to my mother in law. My mother in law helped A LOT the week Peter was in the NICO. She made meals and cleaned while watching the kids.

It was weird coming home though with no baby. That I did a lot of cleaning myself to keep myself busy that week. It was also really hard leaving Thomas and Oliver a lot to go to the NICU. Thank goodness we live on the same street as the hospital and it was only a 3 minute drive. But I tried not to miss a touch time, if I didn't make it I had Dustin go. Touch times were every three hours and if Peter was awake I would stay the whole time he was awake, then once he fell asleep I would go home to my boys if they were home, but then I would also have to pump for 40 minutes when I got home, so I wasn't around that much. I tried to be with my boys when I was home and spent time with them. But it was hard knowing poor Peter was by himself in the hospital, it seriously broke my heart.

Sunday morning came, and his X-rays looked  a lot better and I could tell he was feeling a lot better. He kept pulling off his breathing tubes and you could tell he was done being there. He loved when I held him and he would get excited when Dustin and I would be there that he would try to stay up as long as he could. That was very comforting and hard at the same time, I loved that he recognized me and we had that mother-child connection but it was hard to leave him knowing he would be sad when we were gone, both Dustin and I were very sad to come home that night. 

Monday he continued to improve and they were giving him more food. They would feed him every three hours but I guess he would start crying before that time that nurse started feeding them a half hour early. I guess he gave the nurses a rough time, between being hungry earlier (all my kids eat every 2 hours for the first 6 months)and he would pull of all the wires, and he would cry a lot when I wasn't there. So I think they were thinking I was going to have a hard baby, but I wanted to tell them he's hungry every two hours, and he wants his mom and wants to get out of here, and ever since he's been home there has been less crying ;) 

Tuesday morning I missed one touch time because I took my kids to my brother's house, because I knew my kids needed to get out of the house and have fun with their cousins and I wanted to stay with Peter more, knowing he hated the NICU. Which worked out great because when I came Peter was unplugged with everything!!! I was very excited to see it, I don't know if the nurses were tired of fighting him or the pediatrician let them. But they bottle fed him that day, and I guess he drank that thing so fast! And they said he was a new baby with no wires and to be able to drink from the bottle. So that day we decided to start nursing. It was very frustrating because the nurses were trying to help me, and THAT NEVER WORKS for me. You need to leave me alone when I'm figuring out nursing. And if he didn't latch on after 15 minutes I had to give him a bottle because they didn't want him to burn too many calories. Well, it was hard because he was so used to getting food from the tube that he wasn't used to having to work for it, so that day was long and hard and I felt like a failure when I came home that night and I was very tired.

Then Wednesday came, and I decided to be firm and let the nurse know I wanted to be left alone to nurse and that I had a plan. The nurse that day was way more relax and let me do whatever, it was Great! I came with some pumped milk with a syringe and I slowly trained him to nurse. And he started to latch on very quick after that, it just took a few days to use the pump milk in the syringe to learn to latch on. Then that day the pediatrician said he could come home that NIGHT! I was sooo excited because I thought it would be Friday because originally they thought he would need the anti-biotics for 7 days. But since he didn't have a cold or the flu he didn't need to finish the anti-biotics, so we were just waiting for the circumcision which would be later that day and that they needed to watch him a few hours after that. It was a happy day! And we took him home that night!! And the boys were excited to finally have baby Peter home.

Peter William Clark

Finally he is here!!!

It took him long enough. He's such a sweet heart and so far a pretty easy baby. {knock on wood}

I wanted to write his birth story before I forget because it's amazing how quickly you forget the little details.

Many people thought I wouldn't make it full term but I had a feeling I was going to be late, and painfully I was. Saturday, 17th was my due date and I was hoping that was a day I went to labor because it was a 3-day weekend, but no baby. I had a Dr's appointment that Wednesday, and I thought for sure I would have the baby by then, nope!

I went to my appointment, talked to my Dr. and we decided to induce the following morning. I had mixed feelings because I would rather my body go on it's own because it's a lot faster, but my body hurt and I really didn't want Peter and Oliver to have the same birthday (Oliver's was that Saturday) and I was 4 days over due. All day I was wondering if I had made the right decision, sometimes I over think things. That night I surprisingly slept well and we headed to the hospital at 6am. We got in when the night crew was almost finished with their shift, so they hurried and got me all set up for the morning crew to start the Pitocin. I was bummed a little because I was hoping to get my nurse that I had when I delivered Oliver because she awesome, but my Dr said she worked night shifts but when they had the morning crew come, there she was!!!! I was so excited!!  And the guy that gave me the epidural last time gave it to me again, it was very much like de ja vu. 

But before they gave me the Pitocin I was starting to get some really good contractions and some what more consistent that I actually thought they had already started the process, but I guess they didn't, but I had a feeling if we waited a little longer, like a day,  I probably wouldn't have gone on my own. They started the Pitocin and an hour later I got the epidural. Everyone was saying that I just had this huge basket ball in the front and that you would never known I was pregnant from the back, and I was thinking "Yeah, all 40 pounds in one area, that's why I'm in so much pain". Once the Pitocin and epidural was in I was progressing very fast but my Dr was still in the middle of a surgery that they stopped the Pitocin to slow it down, but my body just kept going. We were just waiting for the Dr to break the water and to deliver. When my nurse checked how dilated I was she said my sack was coming out and that she was shocked it hadn't popped yet, and that it was buldging out, and she said she has only seen that one other time and I thought it was pretty exciting, me, I just wanted the baby, ha ha. Finally the Dr was there, he broke my water, then it was show time. They got things ready, then 3 pushes later he was out! Thank you! Another easy delivery!

And when he came out he was a chunky monkey compared to my other two kids. Everyone was shocked how big he was that everyone was anxiously looking at that scale to see how much he weighed. 9lbs 3.3 ounces! About 2 more pounds than my other kids! It made me feel better about always being in pain during this pregnancy knowing I was carrying a big baby. Everyone chuckled and said that's why I had a nice good basketball-like belly. When he was born he did have low blood sugar so they were watching that, and if you follow me on Face book or Instagram you know he ended up in the NICO, which I will blog on another post. But now he's been home almost a week and life is great. And he's adored by all of us at home.

Pregnancy Update

I haven't been very good at updating this pregnancy on this blog here. Life has been busy. I went full term the week of Christmas and life hasn't slowed down. We had a great New Years and Dustin's mom hosted a fun party, probably one of my favorite New Years, I wish I had taken pictures of that fun night. Then after New Years we all got really sick, at least all of us but Dustin. The day he started work was the day we all got sick, go figure. There were a lot of sleepless nights, and I think we've seen every family movie we own to keep us entertained while we were recovering. And just now we are getting better. So I've been praying to have this little guy in me as long as possible to make sure all the sickness is gone. I went to the dr today and as of today I'm almost 4cm and 45% effaced. I'm hoping I have the baby before my next apt on Wednesday, but that could be wishful thinking. So right now I'm just trying to get the house cleaned and ready to go and hoping all of us we be well when this one decides to come.

Also last week my primary companion threw me a baby shower. I was so touched by everyone who came and my friends in my ward. People are so kind. I just found out last week that our car seat had expired, which I didn't think was a big deal till I read about it so that was an unexpected expense and after the shower I had enough money from gift cards to get another one and then some. I'm greatly blessed.

Anyway, a little update. This picture was taken 39 weeks and 40 lovely pounds.

Christmas 2014

Prepare for a LONG post.

Christmas this year was a blast and probably one of my favorites! It's so fun when you kids are old enough to get excited for Christmas it brings back the magic. 

Friday, before Christmas we had a mini Christmas with Dustin's parents since we were having Christmas with my family and Dustin's parents were going to be in Denver during Christmas.

It started when my mother-in-law picked me up around lunch time and my father-in-law watched the kids. I thought it was just going to be lunch and a little shopping, but my MIL did a lot more than that! Our first stop was Pottery Barn Kids-that store is my down fall, I'm obsessed with it, especially around Christmas time- ask my sister-in-law, Brie who stayed with us during Christmas I pretty much kept talking about that store and showing her catalogs ha ha (thanks Brie for humoring me!)

Anyway my MIL gave me a budget and told me I could get whatever I wanted in there! I was in heaven, even though I was just there the night before with Dustin for our Anniversary which has become an annual tradition. Then she took me to lunch and surprised me with a hair appointment, I started laughing because I desperately needed one, it had been almost 2 years since I have cut my hair so it was much needed. I got some bangs and a trim, I was going to cut it pretty short but the hair dresser talked me out of it, which was probably a good thing since Oliver loves playing with my hair and probably would have been devastated.
Afterwards we had pizza and had our little Christmas, the boys got soccer balls and a goal, Back-packs, and some clothes. Dustin got an art book, and a new suit, and my MIL wrapped up what I picked out at Pottery Barn and surprised me with more stuff from there that I was debating to get. It was a great day.

Then Tuesday night before Christmas everyone arrived! My sister, Nicole and her family stayed with my brother Michael. Then my brother, Paul and his family stayed with us, while my parents got a hotel between the two places. But we always met up at my brother, Michael's house since it was the bigger spot, so poor Trixie had to do a lot of work to feed everyone! It was so much fun and a lot of people! And that's not even half of my family! Christmas Eve we hung out and played a little catch up while the cousins were playing together.

Then we had the kids decorate some cookies while the adults watched and took pictures.

Then it was time to tell the Christmas story. My parents brought really cute costumes with them. Oliver was a really cute donkey but wouldn't wear the hood for very long. Thomas was Joseph and he thought that was pretty cool, he wore his costume a little longer afterwards because he was so excited.

Then we headed home, let the kids open their Pjs and sent them off to bed. Oliver was not very happy about saving cookies for Santa, he wanted to eat them. It was so fun to see the kids excited about their pjs and going to bed waiting for Santa to come. Then the adults went to work. Bikes were popular this year from Santa, poor Dustin had to build 2 bikes, luckily my brother was there to help since he became a pro after building Susie's. I had still a few presents to wrap, and I tied the big bows from Santa and printed off some really cute tags that looked like Santa made them, and I stuffed the Santa bag with presents-it is so fun being Santa. Then we watched a movie that night, it was so fun having Paul and Brie to chill with at night.

Then Christmas morning! Paul's kids were awake before ours, but when Oliver woke up, we woke up Thomas. The first thing Oliver asked if Santa came, I'm so surprised how aware he is about things. The kids were excited about their bikes, Thomas was excited that his bike was a "hulk" bike because it was green. We made the kids take a quick picture before opening presents, little Braden didn't want to be part of it so it's just the three kids.

They boys got a lot this year, I try to keep it simple but some how every year they get a lot. I stay in the budget though! They got a lot of the same toys since they both are into the same things. They got some ninja turtles, a ninja turtle kick boxing toy-now that one is my favorite, and Dustin had fun with that one too, some transformers, blocks, books, more Hulk toys, race track, and everything in between. 

Then I made a breakfast casserole that is a big tradition in Dustin's family and some toast, yogurt, banana bread for our Breakfast. I was excited to use my new Rudolph dishes and table cloth from my Christmas/anniversary presents! Now to have a cute kitchen, and no neon green chairs---one day!

After breakfast and letting the kids play a little, we headed back to Michael's house so the kids could open presents from my parents. The kids got some hot wheels race tracks, and Hulk hands, I would think it's safe to say those were a big hit.

Like I mentioned, a big hit. Thomas had to sleep with them that night:

Then we hung around the next few days. And it was pretty exhausting partying like we did, as you can see:

My sister-in-law took these pictures of all of us siblings asleep at the same time. It was hilarious.  

It was such a fun week and it happened so fast. It makes me excited for our reunion coming up this summer.

Some other things that happened that week that I didn't mention earlier or had pictures were:

Joshua, my nephew got baptized. 

Playing at the church afterwards. The kids had a lot of fun. So did the guys, until Michael hit Dustin in the head with a Nerf dart and gave him an injury and made his head bleed all over. It's was crazy, it was just a toy, but the damage was crazy.

All the girls took me to lunch and we had a little baby shower for me.

And all the great laughs we had.

We had such a great time, it was sad to see everyone go.