Friday, March 8, 2013

Thoughts of a Mother of Two

O the joys of motherhood...

Don't get me wrong, I love being a mother, but there are some days better than others. 
For the most part the transition of having one child to two has been pretty easy. 
But there are some days I wonder why I signed up for this.

Here are just a few of my thoughts:

I swear every time I'm nursing Thomas is in some type of disaster, gets hurt, or needs me that exact moment.

When I go to the grocery store I feel like I need two carts because about time two kids are in the cart and 2 boxes of diapers my cart is pretty much full.

Why do they cry at the same time?

With just Thomas, things just took longer to get done, now I feel like I get nothing done.

It took my three days to finally post this blog post. 

Between feeding both kids, changing diapers I have already put an eight hour day.

Oliver wakes up at sunrise that when I finally put him down again that's when Thomas wakes up- Every time

I haven't had a stretch of sleep more than 2 hours at a time for 6 weeks now. If Oliver has a long stretch of feeding {5hours} Thomas wakes up crying during that time.

Oliver  likes to be held all the time so nothing gets done, but I really don't mind holding him.

I don't know how many iron mans, lions, wolverines, trains I have had to draw for Thomas.

I still haven't lost the last 15 pounds, and I'm getting a little frustrated. So all you more than one time moms how did you lose it? With Thomas  I lost all the weight the first week, than lost additional ten pounds with doing nothing. I just started exercising this week so hopefully things start moving a long. 

Trying to lose the weight, but I'm always hungry and I don't want to eat less for fear of losing my milk supply, especially now I'm exercising. I probably don't need to worry the way I have been going, the freezer is full of extra milk at the moment. 

Feeling guilty all the time. I feel guilty that I don't get to spend as much time with Thomas, I feel like I'm always feeding Oliver. Feeling guilty getting after Thomas more, sometimes I feel like I'm being too hard on him, but than other times I feel like I need to step it up and raise him to be a decent grown up one day. Wondering if he is just being a typical 2 year old and throwing tantrums, or me lacking at my parental skills.

Loving the smiles and cooing from Oliver, and the random hugs from Thomas.

Hearing Thomas saying his prayers. 

Seeing Thomas taking care of Oliver.

Playing dinosaurs and Avengers with Thomas.

Cuddling with Oliver.

Being exhausted at the end of the day, knowing that have been productive.

Knowing that this is the greatest work, and these days will pass and I will miss it. 

I love my two boys even though there are times I want to pull my hair out, I'm so grateful for them!


Clarissa said...

I have had every single one of those feelings the past couple of months.... two kids is hard!! being a Mom is hard! {{right, now Stu is telling me how mad he is at me because I didn't buy him a dump truck at the store..!}} Good thing the cute, fun time out way the bad.. even though it is pretty even some times. You are a great Mom! It gets easier I promise!!

Brianna said...

loved this post. Keep up the good work. And you lose baby weight WAY faster than most women, including me, so just be patient. It will come off. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I enjoyed reading them!

Anonymous said...

Such cute pics Jess! I miss you so much!

Jocelyn Christensen said...

Been thinking about you!!!